Archives
29/11: Obesity in the United States.
The following animated GIF shows the prevalnce of obesity from 1985.
It is very shocking and scary to see the rise of obesity over the years.
15/11: Very cool trick on the net.
Goto any favourite website of yours. Once the main page is loaded, copy and paste the following in the Address bar and hit enter.
javascript:R=0; x1=.1; y1=.05; x2=.25; y2=.24; x3=1.6; y3=.24; x4=300; y4=200; x5=300; y5=200; DI= document.images; DIL=DI.length; function A(){for(i=0; i<DIL; i++){DIS=DI[ i ].style; DIS.position='absolute'; DIS.left=Math.sin(R*x1+i*x2+x3)*x4+x5; DIS.top=Math.cos(R*y1+i*y2+y3)*y4+y5}R++}setInterval('A()',5 ); void(0)
Cheers!
08/11: Funny Signs
In a nonsmoking area:
"If we see smoking we will assume you are on fire and take
appropriate action."
On maternity room door:
"Push, Push, Push."
Plumber:
"We repair what your husband fixed."
On a fence:
"Salesmen welcome, dog food is expensive."
At a car dealership:
"The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."
At the electric company:
"We would be de-lighted if you send in your bill.
However, if you don't you will be."
Outside a hotel:
"Help! We need inn-experienced people."
On the door of a computer store:
"Out for a quick byte."
Pizza shop slogan:
"7 days without pizza makes one weak."
At a tire shop in Milwaukee:
"Invite us to your next blowout."
Door of a plastic surgeons office:
"Hello, can we pick your nose?"
Sign at the psychic's hotline:
"Don't call us, we'll call you."
At a laundry shop:
"How about we refund your money, send you a new one at no charge,
close the store and have the manager shot. Would that be
satisfactory?"
At a towing company:
"We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."
Billboard on the side of the road:
"Keep your eyes on the road and stop reading these signs."
On an electricians truck:
"Let us remove your shorts."
At an optometrists office
"If you don't see what your looking for you've come to the right
place."
On a taxidermist's window:
"We really know our stuff."
In a Podiatrist's office:
"Time wounds all heels."
On a Butchers window:
"Let me meat your needs."
Outside a muffler shop:
"No appointment necessary, we hear you coming."
On a desk in a reception room:
"We shoot every 3rd salesman , and the 2nd one just left."
In a veterinarians waiting room:
"Be back in 5 minutes, Sit ! Stay!"
In a restaurant window:
"Don't stand there and be hungry, come on in and get fed up."
Inside a bowling alley:
"Please be quiet, we need to hear a pin drop."
In the front yard of a funeral home:
"Drive carefully, we'll wait."
In a counselors office:
"Growing old is mandatory, growing wise is optional.
07/11: Reuters Article - Interview with Borat
Q: Which country to do you prefer -- Kazakhstan or the USA?
A: "I very much preferring Kazakhstan - it nicest place in the world! Please, you must look on my guidings book and then come visit. Bring your whole family and stay at Astana Funworld Resort - it have beautiful beaches, almost totally free of landmines and the sea is guarantee to have no jellyfish, shark, or any other marine life."
Q: Which people are smarter?
A: "Kazakh peoples is definite has more powerful brains. Government scientist, Dr. Yamak have prove that our glorious leader, Premier Nazarbamshev have IQ of 412 and a brain that extend into most of his chest - it no surprise that he have never fail in complete any jigsaw puzzle. Since 93 percent of Kazakh people is direct relate to him within 3 generations, rest of population also shares this great intellects."
Q: What advice do you have for people traveling around the United States?
A: "My book contains many useful informations for Kazakh peoples traveling to US and A - for example, best places to photograph ladies without their knowledge, location of Grand Canyons if you need place to dispose of a wife and location of Kazakh Embassy and where to go if you want to shoot a Redindians."
Q: When can people expect to see you in Kazakhstan again?
A: "I already in Kazakhstan, living very happilys with my new wife. This morning, I was awoke by my clock-radio (electronic LED), after which I remove my wife from her cage and she make me delicious breakfast of western cereal 'Frosties', which I have with delicious fresh milk from her chests. I then attach her to her plough and send her into the fields before returning to my bed until she come back at luchtimes to feed me again. Life is very nice for us."
Q: Who do you favor for President in the United States?
A: "I cannot believe that it possible a woman can become Premier of US and A - in Kazakhstan, we say that to give a woman power, is like to give a monkey a gun - very dangerous. We do not give monkeys guns any more in Kazakhstan ever since the Astana Zoo massacre of 2003 when Torkin the orang-utan shoot 17 schoolchildrens. I personal would like the basketball player, Barak Obamas to be Premier."
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